Magic Inc. Book Two Excerpts

Magic and Soul

“My Dad always said I was talented. That I was meant for great things. But I never really understood why. I mean, I come from a powerful family, but… I never – I barely had to work at it. Magic just came easily to me. For a while, as a child, I was fascinated with the idea of being powerful or exceptional. Especially when I thought about how different I felt from the other kids. But then… it started to feel pointless. I was good, but I never got any better because there was no reason to. No motivation. So, I – well, I had to look for a reason.” “Did you find one?” Chaz chuckled. “Yeah, I did. And it was important, so I trained hard. And I did get better. But I still felt like I didn’t deserve to be so powerful. Like the power wasn’t even mine, and was only given to me to fulfill a purpose that could have easily been someone else’s. That’s why I get so – obsessed, I guess – with running Magic Inc. sometimes. It was something I had to learn to do on my own. I mean, through my Dad’s help, but… I really had to work at it. It may give me a lot of stress, especially now, but when I do make something happen, I know I did it on my own. I earned it.” I smiled, then thought for a moment. “It’s good that you love your work. And that you want to work hard. I know that’s admirable. I just don’t think you should feel bad about being powerful. About having something so special come naturally to you. Because isn’t magic, like, a part of your soul? Even if you didn’t have to work at it so much, you should be proud that it’s a part of you. It’s your strength of soul, the connection to who you are, that makes you powerful. It does belong to you.” Chaz looked surprised. “I… well, never thought of it that way.” “Maybe you were meant to fulfill a role, but that doesn’t mean that’s why you’re powerful. Maybe you were chosen because you are powerful already,” I continued. “And I don’t think having a destiny means that we don’t have any say in it. That we don’t get to decide what it is. It’s only that some part of us has decided already.” “You are incredibly insightful, Jane,” Chaz said, shaking his head. “I’m not sure if you’re right – no one can really know how this works – but when you say it with such certainty, I believe you.” I wasn’t really sure why I was so certain. Just that I still believed we were meant to be together, and that I would have chosen that life no matter what options were in front of me. But I wasn’t sure he would feel the same. “Would you choose this life?” I asked, quietly. “If you could just be normal. Free from your responsibilities. Just a college student, studying game design?” “There are things I would change if I could,” Chaz replied, sadly. And I knew he was thinking of his father again. “But yes,” he said, looking into my eyes with sincerity, “I would choose this life.”

~

It Was Him

I rushed past them, back down the stairs again to the adjoining bathroom. I threw myself against the wall. I bit my fist to keep the sobs from alerting anyone and prayed no one would need the first floor restroom until I could pull myself together. Then I flashed back to getting cornered the day everything went wrong, and I felt dizzy. My secret place turned into a prison. The walls blurred, and I wanted to cry out for help. But what would that do? Just give them all something to laugh about later. But I remembered the phone. And Chaz’s promise to answer no matter what. I pulled the phone from my bag, and so no one would hear me talking, texted him instead. “He hates me,” I wrote. Then erased it. “They hate me,” I sent. “I hate myself,” I followed with. The answers were almost instantaneous. “Jane.” … “What happened?” “Jenny told everyone I pushed her,” I sent. “They said they wished it had been me instead.” “God… I’m so sorry.” … “Where are you? In class?” “Sobbing in the bathroom,” I admitted in text. “Do you want me to come get you?” I did. More than anything. But then, my Mom would find out. And she’d get involved. “Jane?” Chaz prompted. “No,” I typed back. But before I could send it, he started calling. The phone was silenced, but it buzzed in my hand. I couldn’t stop myself from answering. “Chaz,” I whispered into the phone, desperately. “I’m coming to get you,” he said. I heard a door close behind him. “No!” I told him. “Don’t – I’ll… get in trouble.” “You wouldn’t get in trouble,” Chaz assured me. “No, I’m… okay. Really, I am. I just – I just needed to hear your voice.” And it was so true. My body was no longer trembling. My tears were lessening. It was like he was right here with me. In the dark fortress of school. “Jane.” He said my name like his heart was breaking. And I almost started sobbing again. Then he sighed, giving into my insistence. “Listen to me, Jane. You are the most amazingly kind, and brave, and beautiful person I know.” I blushed at the word beautiful. “They don’t know what they’re doing. What they’re missing by alienating you. Kids are cold, and cruel. But it’s really just fear. They’re afraid of anything ‘different’, so they attack anyone who doesn’t fit in. And I know what you’re feeling.” Like I want to die, I thought. But didn’t dare say it. “You think you’re broken. You think you have no place. But what’s waiting for you is more than they can imagine. You think you’re weak, because you feel everything they say like a stab in the heart. But that heart – it can also feel love more deeply than they can. And someday…” He hesitated. “Someday, you’ll find someone who understands that. Who feels it, too.” But I had. It was him.